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WARRIOR SEA TRIBES!
Please appreciate that the following information is in-trusted to you with the utmost confidence, we must insist that you do not repeat any of this to anyone whom you do not know and trust personally The disputed territories of Mau Mau Island, known also as Barren Island or White Island (depending on your alliances) are again the center of a tempestuous conflict, one that has been raging for as long as its history is recorded. Bitter warfare between the wampum industry, Europeans, the Schenck family, fertilizers, fish oil, glue and garbage disposal industries, the Gateway shopping mall near Erskine Avenue and the so-called "Parks Department of New York" has come to a critical strategic tipping point. Fair citizens, it has come to us to tip the balance. In receiving this message, you have been formally challenged to participate in the greatest naval battle the world has ever known. You are charged to design and build experimental watercraft and compete in...... THE THREE CHALLENGES |
The swimming Cities collective has made the first strike and
bravely gained control of strategically important territories to the south east of Mau Mau known as the Goldenrod camping area in Floyd Benett field for the weekend of July 22-25. During this period we will launch a surprise attack on the island from a secret parking area to its west. Vessels and supplies can be carried to the waters surrounding the island through a treacherous waste, patrolled by obese child soldiers on dirtbikes. Once inside we must put to test our skills of engineering, building and strategy in.....THE THREE CHALLENGES
THE THREE CHALLENGES
ONE: CIRCUMNAVIGATION RACE: In 1522 Ferdinand Magellan completed a rather tawdry and over-celebrated circumnavigation of our earth. Were he alive today he would run and cower between the legs of his Portuguese king at the perils that await you around the island of Mau Mau. This challenge will test the absolute limits of our understanding of nautical engineering covering a distance of nearly two thirds of a mile and passing perils such as The Bridge of Perils, The Boat Graveyard of perils, several Beaches of Peril and The Perilous Raft of Infinite Liquor and BBQ.
TWO: BOAT JOUSTING: The oldest representations of water jousting have been found on bas-reliefs dating from the Ancient Egyptian empire. These relate more to a form of brawling than a leisure activity; given that the jousters are wearing no form of protection and carrying gaffes with two points at their end. In France crusaders and sailors, awaiting embarkation for the Holy land during the Crusades faced off in single combat mounted on small boats. In this challenge you may construct and crew a craft for the purpose of pitting your greatest warrior against that of another tribe. Please protect your warrior by placing him at the rear of your boat with a chest plate and flotation device. And please no engines.
THREE: GENERAL BATTLE : This should be self explanatory. Please be mindful to keep track of and remove your debris.
This operation being of a clandestine nature is in no way sanctioned by the governing powers of Mau Mau or the surrounding districts. Please be cautious
And may I add on a personal note that, No generation in history has been faced with such grave responsibility. It is at this time and in this place that we must all choose between two very different post war environments, one where we shall reap bountiful resources of tumbleweeds, rare bird eggs and old timey garbage. Or one where your children will awaken in a nightmare world ruled by these heartless creatures: the Upland Sandpiper, Savannah Sparrow, Short-Eared Owl, Henslow's Sparrow, Vesper Sparrow, Northern Harrier, Grasshopper Sparrow, Eastern Meadowlark, Bobolink, Homed Lark. Valiant soldiers, by the dusk of the third day at Mau Mau we shall be victorious or dine in Valhalla. May the gods bless us all
-Swimming Cities Collective